Monday, October 5, 2009

Fat and Pregnant...

You're not supposed to freak out about your weight while pregnant. I mean, you're not supposed to be insane, but pregnant chicks gain weight.

But I *am* freaking out.

Those of you who know me know that went from a size 24, 280 pound chick after Rhi was born to a size 6, 140 pound chick in about two years. I did it with Weight Watchers and a bunch of exercise, and I'm very very proud of it.

But losing all that weight does something to you. If I gained over, say 2-3 pounds, I freaked out a little. I *had* to get back down. Immediately. So this pregnancy is, well, difficult. To say the least.

I've gained, at last count (read as "from when I weighed myself this morning." But I was wearing clothes and it was after I ate, so it's not totally accurate), about seven pounds. Not good for a first trimester, but not the worst ever, since I have all of a week of two left to trimester two. But I'm nervous about it nonetheless. I don't want to gain a billion pounds with this baby and spend another two years taking it off. I'm freaked out by the thought of having to restart WW, and recount points, and do all that crap. And it's hard for me to see myself not gaining a bunch more weight with this pregnancy, due to a few factors. One, I'm *always* hungry. Think of how you feel after you haven't eaten for a long time, that ravenous, almost puking from hunger, dizzy, shaky feeling. Imagine that EVERY TWO HOURS. No joke. Also, I have morning sickness that seems to best cure itself when confronted with comfort foods, like mac and cheese, pasta, avocados, mashed potatoes, and Cheezits. None of those are at all low calorie.

And then there's the fatigue. My normal gym buff self appears to have gotten lost somewhere. I'm confronted with someone who is so tired that the gym, while a good idea theoretically, is also just not happening for. And the few times I have gone, I've been practically decimated by workouts that normally would have been NOTHING to me. Like, thirty minutes on the treadmill, once a light workout, makes me feel like I've climbed the Alps. And don't even get me started on the weights. I'm lifting at least twenty pounds less than normal and straining to do it.

On one hand, I know I need to take steps to get myself on a better track. I need to stop whining and start finding a better way of doing things. I need to get motivated to get back to the gym and suck it up. But on the other hand, I keep thinking, "Man, there's a very short time left in my first trimester. Everything is supposed to even out a little then. Maybe I should just let it ride for the time being, and start again when I feel less horrible all the time." But there's no real reason the believe that at the second trimester - POOF! - I'll be 100% again, so I should probably just get over it now.

I don't know. Any suggestions?


Cindy L. said...

When I was pregnant I gained about ten lbs and then didn't gain anything else until I was about eight months pregnant. I think the reason I didn't gain a lot of weight or show as quickly as other people is because I walked CONSTANTLY. I worked at Wal-Mart at the time and I was always on my feet. So I figure, stay active as much as you can -- even if you walk for a few minutes and then have to take a break. Obviously I have never been pregnant more than once, but I found the less that I sat around, the less I wanted to graze. :) You might not be able to do the extent of what you were doing before, but you can do SOMETHING.

Cindy L. said...

Oh -- I should mention that if you don't remember, when I started working at Scholastic no one could tell I was pregnant and I was about 7 months then. I gained all my weight about a month after working there!!! Sitting on my butt!

Harmony said...

I'll just parrot Cindy. Do what you can, it's better than nothing. This time round, second trimester didn't bring any great joyous trumpets or anything. I found swimming to be helpful for about five seconds, but that's because I get so sick from motion its sad. Try keeping lots of fruits in your diet, you'll feel less guilty about eating 6 oranges, than say 6 bowls of ice cream. :-)