Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Just Be Happy With Who You Are

I've heard that statement, or one like it, a billion times and you probably have too. But it never disturbed me until today.

I was trying to figure out what my BMI is right now (let's just say not good :/) and I happened upon some forum. The girl was 5'7" and 180lbs. She was asking how to know what size frame she had and how to know if she was within a decent weight limit.

Someone posted the information on frame sizes, and she identified herself as having a large frame. So someone posted this, "Well, you're like 15 pounds above the range for your height, but that's not that bad. You should just be happy with who you are."

So this girl is trying to lose weight and be healthier, is looking for the right range to do it in, and the only feedback she gets is that it's ok and just to be happy? Seriously?

Yes, 15 pounds isn't that much. Pfft, I *wish* I only had 15 pounds to lose (and might I add that large framed people suck - my frame is classified as small, even though I'm super tall, and it means a 10 pound difference to the BMI charts for me. Damn it.) But 15 pounds extra is still excess weight, and if someone is trying to lose it, you should ENCOURAGE them, not advocate that they ignore it! Jeez, this chick had previous posts and she was really looking for healthy weight loss ideas . It wasn't like she was anorexic or trying to binge and purge to lose weight!

I wonder, sometimes, if the "just be happy as you are" movement is causing lots of unintended trouble. If I was complacently happy, I wouldn't be going back to school, or trying to make my life (and my family's) healthier. Would I be happier? Maybe short term. But long term, I imagine it would cause more stress, lower quality of life, and less happiness.

I try to think of what to tell my girls. Because I *do* want them to have high self esteem and love who they are. But I also want them to strive, to always reach for improvement. To want to be the best that they can be.

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